Its Not Enough
by sweet-and-somber
Summary: Tweek gets a new girlfriend and Craig doesn't like it at all. *Note: There is suicide in this.


He sat there in the rain as the scarlet water flowed from his thighs. It had been a while since he felt the feeling of a cool blade. Craig felt pathetic and meaningless to the whole world that surrounded him. He could smell the alcohal on his breath as everything around him disappeared. His blue eyes looked dead and his body didn't shake from the cold.

Craig thought of his boyish face, his perfect sculpted body, that angelic glow that shined from him. Tweek was the only one who understood his mentality. Why Craig did what he did to himself now that Tweek was gone, he had nothing as he sat on the swing at the park. The place he told Tweek his secret.

Tweek was his best friend and the only person that knew Craig was gay. Craig loved him secretly and wasn't afraid to open up to him at all. They could talk for hours and Craig loved to listen to his voice. He was still boyish and shy, but it made Craig feel good knowing Tweek was a bit insecure around him. They were inseparable and had each others back through almost everything.

Tweek didn't care about the random black outs Croat had. His excessive drinking. He didn't care about the scars on his wrist because Tweek had done the same at one point. Tweek knew why Craig was so hurt. Craig's dad bashed on him all the time for being gay. But that didnt matter to Craig. He felt on top of the world with Tweek around. Like he could do anything.

Until the day Tweek got a girlfriend.

"She's so amazing! And when we talk, its like the world around us doesn't exist. Its just the two of us." Tweek smiled as he laid his xbox controller down. Craig felt anger and jealousy ball up in his stomach. He wanted it to be him Tweek was excited about, not some girl that he had only known for a month.

She was hot, no denying that, but Craig would never touch her even if he was straight. Her long brown locks and green eyes couldn't fool him. She had the body of a porn star and she did get around. Tweek even knew that but he was so infatuated with her that he didn't care. Craig thought of all the guys she slept with and how many STDs she might have caught a long the way. "So what man? She's so nice and she helps me stop with the biting. I think I love her!'

"And what about me! " Craig shouted. "I've loved you from the start and you were so blind to fucking notice!" He stormed out before Tweek could say anything. He didn't want him calling him a fag like his father did. Tell him he would never felt the same about him.

Craig couldn't handle the rejection.

He promised Tweek that he would never listen to the call of the blade ever again, but now he feels like he had to. He wanted to forget it all. Wanted to bleed out the feelings he once had for the blonde haired green eyed boy, but even as the rain poured against him, he could still see his face. The confusion that caked Tweeks face, looking for a response to what came out of Craigs mouth. But Craig didn't offer him the chance.

Craig cried as he remembered the days when they were younger and he first realized his love for Tweek. They were twelve and just got done playing basket ball outside. They were both exhausted and Tweek had fallen asleep. Craig watched him sleep and smiled at the cute faces Tweek made. He often found himself thinking of that day and wondered what Tweek was dreaming about that made him so happy. He had secretly hoped the dreams involved him somehow.

The feeling of pain thrashed against his heart and he sobbed. He failed Tweek. He gave into everything he promised he wouldn't give into. When his dad found out about him being gay, he went into a deep depression of drugs and self abuse. It was Tweek who saved him. It was Tweek that pushed his demons away. And it was Tweek who slept next to him at night when Craig was having a tough time dealing with things. It was misleading, but that's what true friends do. Craig wonders if he would ever get that back with Tweek.

"How did I know you'd be here?" Tweek called out. Craig looked back at the six foot angel and tried to hide his shame. "Oh Craig," Tweek cried. "You promised!"

"Why does it matter? You got Sammi to look after, remember?" The swing creeked as Tweek looked for an answer.

Craig poked at the blood stains on his jeans as he began to go back to his deep thinking. He knew Tweek would get frustrated and walk away soon. But instead, Tweek began to cry. Tweek knew Craig hated himself, but he didn't know why. Craig was his best friend and helped him when he got picked on. Tweek was straight, but he didn't give a fuck that his best friend was gay. He loved him no matter what because that's just what best friends do. He didn't want that to change between them. Even if Craig loves him in a certain way.

"I love you man, and I don't want you hurting yourself. Sure I have Sammi , but your my bro. I know you might not want it to be that way, but love is love. And I love you enough to tell you not to hurt yourself like this anymore." Tweek tried to reach put for Craig, but he jumped at his touch.

"That isn't enough," Craig shouted with his back turned to Tweek. "No one is going to accept me now. I have no one because of that damn girl!"

"Things won't change between u-"

"They will! That's why I gotta do this!" Craig pulled out the pistol and cocked it. Tweek still wonders what Craig shouted as the thunder boomed. What his facial expression was as he pulled the trigger.

Tweek doesn't remember the seconds before Craig left. He doesn't remember the feeling of the blood splattering all over his face. Somehow Craig ended up being in his arms as he cried for him to stay. He had lost his best friend. His protector. All because he couldn't face being alone. Was this really unbearable? Tweek thought to himself as the ambulance took Craig away.

Why couldn't it have been enough?


End file.
